


I Feel I've Stood Here Once Before

by edenofalltrades



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Bisexual Poe Dameron, CW: Suicide, Damerey Week, F/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Palm Springs AU, Self-Destructive Behavior, Temporary Character Death, Time Loop, Title from a Bad Suns song
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-29
Updated: 2020-10-29
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:02:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27258376
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/edenofalltrades/pseuds/edenofalltrades
Summary: This is one of those infinite time loop situations you might have heard about. For longer than he could keep track of, Poe Dameron has woken up to relive the same day. Although he learned to live with the monotony of it all, could one fateful night turn things around and give new meaning to his life?
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Other(s), Poe Dameron/Rey, Rey/Other(s)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 15





	I Feel I've Stood Here Once Before

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars and will not be making any profit from this story.
> 
> A huge thank you to taidine and [Olpgurl](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Olpgurl/profile) for beta reading.
> 
> \--------------------------------------------------------------------  
> Title comes from the song [Disappear Here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uqoprsR9Fgo) by Bad Suns
> 
> The Spotify playlist I made for this story can be found [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/78TbAoAEoRFyI85zmKrXBg?si=sLs29kXeR_6PK3plpTJawQ)
> 
>  **Warning:** This is a time loop story that is an AU of a movie. Death is not permanent so things like drinking while driving and suicide will happen. If this makes you uncomfortable, please turn back now. Characters might sometimes seem OOC to hit important plot points.

“Wake up.”

Those words whispered by his girlfriend, Zorii, had woken Poe up every day for the last… who even knows how long. Still, they were welcome. Especially in the seductive tone she used. Especially this morning.

“Good morning!” Zorii added cheerfully as she plopped her leg onto the bed and started to rub lotion onto it. 

Feeling bold, Poe decided to go for it. 

“That’s a good leg,” he said in his most seductive tone, cocking an eyebrow. 

“Alright,” Zorii sighed. “But we have to be quick!”

“Oh we’ll be quick.” Poe leaped out of the bed to where she was at the other side of the room, pressing his lips against hers as he led them to the bathroom. 

The bed was boring. They’d used it dozens of times already; he felt like the bathroom counter that morning. 

“We can’t get too sweaty,” Zorii complained as he kissed down her neck. “I don’t have time to shower again.”

There were times Poe was tempted to delay her, make her so sweaty she had no choice but to shower… preferably with him, just to get a rise out of her. This morning he didn’t feel like it. He’d go quick and get her to the bridesmaids brunch on time. 

Besides, he had a full day of lounging ahead of him that he didn’t want to miss out on and he still had to decide what he’d do that night. Funny how having infinite choices and infinite chances led to more indecision than when there was only one chance and every action needed to be weighed carefully. 

Once Poe was free, he chose one of his favorite pre-wedding activities as of late - lounging on the pizza-shaped pool float drinking beer. Poe was halfway through his first beer when Finn, a new friend he’d made at the wedding, swam up to him, taking the beer Poe always remembered to bring along. 

“Good day so far?” Finn asked as he cracked open the beer and took a sip.

“Today, tomorrow, yesterday, it’s all the same.” Poe sighed. “You?”

“The day is young. Ask me again at the end.” Oh how badly Poe missed Finn’s optimism. “Anything can happen.”

“Not today, buddy,” Poe chuckled. “Nice try though.”

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

While Poe went to the reception more often than not, he didn’t always bother going to the ceremony portion of the wedding. That day he decided to attend, though he didn’t feel the need to change. His days of wearing stuffy tuxedos were over. 

Cracking open another beer as the officiant started talking, Poe mused at how lovely the ceremony was. He also noted how miserable one of the bridesmaids looked. 

Not the maid of honor, Paige’s sister, Rose, who was beaming with pride. Certainly not Zorii who was happy to get any attention she could. No, the one in between them. Rachel? Renée? He could never remember her name but he was sure it was something along those lines. 

Poe would definitely have to talk to her at the reception. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I’m so honored to be here as the maid of honor at my big sister’s wedding!” Rose announced to the room. “How amazing is this couple? I mean, it’s no surprise we’re all here today. From the moment Paige met Nix, I could tell they were destined to be together.”

Rose paused, looking over at Paige, who smiled and mouthed “Thank you”

From the other side of the room, Rey, their step-sister, stood at the bar waiting for the wine she ordered. Looking over, she saw that the bartender had only filled a third of the glass. 

“Seriously?!” Rey whined. “Help me out here. This isn’t the night for moderation.”

Connie, the bartender, reluctantly tilted the bottle back against the glass. “It’s not good wine.”

“I don’t care,” Rey scoffed, keeping her eyes on the glass to make sure the bartender filled it up. It was an open bar and she was going to make sure Paige and Nix got their money’s worth. 

Rey got back to her table just as Rose was finishing up her speech. No sooner had she sat down and put the wine glass against her lips did she hear, “And now I’d like to welcome up our sister, Rey.”

“Go on, darling,” her father encouraged her. To go up in front of the crowded room. To give a speech no one had warned her about. 

Eyes wide, Rey confessed, “I didn’t know I was supposed to give a speech.”

“You’re one of the bridesmaids and the sister of the bride, of course you’re supposed to give a speech,” her father explained like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“She’s been drinking, Luke,” her step-mother chimed in with that perpetually disappointed tone Rey hated. 

“Rey,” Rose whispered, waving for Rey to come over.

Clearing her throat, Rey nodded. She could do this. She took that one improv class back in Austin. Getting up from her seat she was just about to go over to get the mic when she heard…

“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.”

A man Rey didn’t remember seeing before but who looked vaguely familiar went over to take the microphone from Rose. Rey couldn’t make out what they were saying from where she was standing but she welcomed anything that could buy her even a few minutes to think of something good to say, or hell, even just something to say. 

The guy was… interesting to say the least. He had a handsome face and great hair, but for some reason thought it would be a good idea to go to a wedding wearing a white t-shirt and black shorts. 

“What is love? Some would say ‘baby don’t hurt me’. But I believe it’s more. Love is that indescribable feeling of finding someone you care about deeply, that you connect with on an almost spiritual level. When you find that one person you’re meant to be with. It’s what I see when I look at Paige Veronica Tico and Nicholas Joshua Jerd. That feeling when you realize you aren’t alone in the world.” The man turned and faced Rey directly. “And though times may be rough and unpredictable, always remember, you are never alone.”

“Everyone here is your family and we’re rooting for you.” The man turned back around. Rey shook her head, clearly she must have just been seeing something that wasn’t there. 

“So raise a glass!” The man lifted up his beer can, popping the top off with one hand. Looking directly at Rey again he finished his big speech with, “You may have felt lost, but now you are found. Cheers!”

Fortunately for Rey, that was the last speech of the night before a break for the second course, and then the DJ resumed the music for people who wanted to dance. Not wanting to get pulled in, Rey got another glass of wine from the bar and walked over to the side where it would be easier to avoid most of the more social members of her family who insisted she participate in these events. 

Then again, it wasn’t like the other guests were any better. Armitage Hux, a six foot something red haired man, came over to her for at least the third time that night, trying to get her to dance.

“I already told you no earlier, Hux,” Rey scoffed. “What makes you think I changed my mind?”

“You had more to drink?” Based on the way he was slurring his words, that was definitely true for him. 

“That doesn’t change anything.” Rey narrowed her eyes.

“Whatever, I don’t need a lecture,” Hux brushed her off, dancing away from her - or at least it appeared to be an attempt to dance away. Rey couldn’t really tell exactly what he was doing but as he left she seriously wondered how anyone could find that behavior attractive. 

Not even thirty seconds after Hux left, the guy who gave the speech earlier walked towards Rey. She tried to brace herself to give the same spiel she was going to give everyone else who tried to get her to dance that night - she was flattered thanks, but no thank you, she was quite happy to drink her shitty wine on the sidelines - when his actions once again surprised her.

Instead of walking up to Rey directly, he stopped at one of the men nearby her, tapping him on one shoulder to distract him so he could go around the other shoulder to take a sip of his drink. He then moved on to seamlessly take a drink out of the hand of a woman that passed by, coming from what should have been his blind spot. As he kept moving forward, he got in between a dancing couple, moving in total sync with them all the while keeping his eyes trained on Rey. 

Twirling around so he was away from the couple, he handed the empty glass to a woman passing by and moved in sync with a few more people, making his way closer and closer to Rey. He was psychic, he had to be, there was no other way he could predict exactly how the crowd would move. Then again, if he really were psychic, he would be able to predict that asking Rey to dance, like he just did, would get him a shake of the head. He tried once more, getting a firmer head shake before he nodded and made a gesture that he accepted her answer. 

Shimmying away, he went back to the first guy whose drink he siphoned and pulled out a chair. At first Rey couldn’t understand why but then when the other man fell down, perfectly into the chair it all made sense - sort of… she still had no idea how this guy’s timing was so impeccable! Blowing a kiss in her direction he damn near glided away. Okay, Rey admitted, he had her interest piqued. 

Following him to a quieter area of the reception, she saw him standing at one of the tables, sniffing something…

“What are you smelling?” Rey asked to get his attention.

“Orchid Explosion by Fournier. Right?” He was really starting to freak her out.

“How did…”

“I know my hair mists,” he explained. “I dated a girl who would practically bathe in it.”

“I honestly can’t stand it, but Paige got it for me as a birthday gift so I had to wear it,” Rey justified.

“That makes sense,” Poe conceded. 

Before Rey had a chance to say anything else, Connie came over with two drinks for Poe, letting him know they were the drinks he hadn’t picked up from the bar. 

“Thank you,” Poe said flirtatiously with a wink towards the bartender’s direction, though it was met with an eye roll. “I always get an extra one to save myself a trip.”

“Or you could just be an alcoholic,” Rey noted.

“Not ruling that out either,” Poe shrugged as he handed one of the glasses towards her. 

“Thank you.” Rey smiled as she took the glass, clinking it against his with a cheers before taking a sip of the strange alcoholic concoction. 

“I don’t think we met at the rehearsal dinner,” Rey noted, deciding to find a nicer way to bring up the fact that she didn’t know who the hell he was when he seemed to know everything about her. 

“No, I’m Poe, Zorii’s boyfriend,” he introduced himself with his hand extended.

“Rey.” She shook his hand. 

Poe had just opened his mouth to say something when Rey’s Aunt Leia came over. “Dear, I’ve been to more weddings in my life than you can imagine.”

He muttered something under his breath that sounded suspiciously like “You might be surprised”. 

“And out of all of them, the speech you gave is the best I’d ever heard.” Leia reached forward and hugged Poe, who thanked her for the kind words, before leaving them. 

“That was nice,” Poe smiled. 

“I bet it was,” Rey snarked. “Did you actually believe a word of what you said?”

“Not even remotely.” Poe shook his head. “Love is a gimmick made up by Hallmark and we’re all dying alone.”

Rey had to stifle back a laugh. It would be an understatement to say she didn’t expect to hear such words coming from someone who waxed so poetically about all the virtues of love and togetherness not one hour earlier. 

Some rustling in the distance caught Poe’s attention and he asked, “Hey, would you wanna go someplace where we could be alone?”

“Wow!” The balls on this guy. Didn’t he just say he had a girlfriend? “Seriously?!”

“No, it’s just that, your Dad and Mom…”

“Step-mother.” Rey clarified. “My mum’s dead.”

“Right, step-mom,” Poe corrected himself. “They’re about to sing a song and I’m not in the emotional state to handle that right now.”

“And what would your girlfriend think of us running off together?”

“I don’t think she’d have a problem with it,” Poe assured. “I can prove it.”

Taking Rey by the hand, he led her to the window that looked into one of the bathrooms. Sitting on the counter by the sink was Zorii, getting eaten out by what looked to be the officiant of the wedding, Beaumont Kin. 

“Oh wow!” Rey tried to figure out what to say in response. She hadn’t known Zorii all that well. She was Paige’s sorority sister who was a few years ahead of her. Rey had really only met her a few times but she always came off a bit pompous and arrogant. “Can’t say I ever really liked her.”

“She has her moments,” Poe said as he turned around and slunk down against the wall. 

“You have no problem with her doing that?!”

“Doesn’t matter,” Poe shrugged. “There isn’t a scenario where those two don’t end up together.”

Rey turned around and sat down next to him. Trying to cheer him up, she went down the only path she could think of - self-deprecation. “If it makes you feel better, my entire family is embarrassed of me. It’s pretty clear I’m the black sheep.”

“Why would you say that?” Poe frowned. 

“They’re constantly trying to baby me, tell me how to live my life, make decisions for me, it’s…” Rey sighed. “It’s infuriating.”

“I’ll bet.” Poe nodded. 

“It’s just that…” Rey continued. “I wish they’d take me seriously when I tell them I can do things on my own. That I don’t always need their input or advice!”

“Totally. You don’t need a leg up.”

No sooner than when the words left his mouth did Zorii moan, “Hold my leg up!” 

“That was really weird timing,” Poe laughed. 

“This is so messed up,” Rey shook her head. Seriously, what exactly were they still doing sitting outside a room where his girlfriend was getting oral sex from some other guy?!

“It really is,” Poe nodded, moving closer to Rey. 

“Is it weird that it’s sorta turning me on?” Rey asked, moving closer to Poe.

“I’m right there with you.” Poe closed the gap and kissed Rey softly. “Wanna get out of here? Find someplace quiet, for real?”

Rey nodded, smiling cheekily. 

Taking her by the hand, Poe once again led her away, whispering, “I know a place.”

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The place Poe knew was a desert a half mile away from the wedding site. It was a good thing that he was such a fantastic kisser and that Rey was already two glasses of terrible wine and half a cocktail in because given all that she knew about him and how many true crime podcasts she listened to, there was about a 70/30 chance he was going to murder her and dump her body in one of the caves. 

But what a way to go. 

The boulder they were leaning against dug into Rey’s shoulder as they made out. Poe moved his hand through her hair and down her arm while she fumbled with the ties on his shorts. After a few minutes of struggling she gave up, pulling away from him and asking in frustration, “I give up. Would you please just take off your clothes?”

“If the lady insists,” Poe said dramatically as he made a show of getting up. 

Rey leaned back, finding a more comfortable position against the boulder and watched as Poe pulled his t-shirt off, revealing a toned chest. “Very nice.”

“Thank you.” He waggled his eyebrows before turning his attention to the tie on his shorts, pulling it loose in considerably less time than it took Rey. 

He had his hands on the waistband, a split second away from pulling them down, when an arrow came flying out of nowhere, hitting him in the shoulder. “Owww!”

“What the fuck is happening?!” Rey screamed, terrified and confused. 

“I thought I smelled you, you jackass!” Poe screamed out into the void. 

“Who are you talking to?!” Rey asked. “Poe, what the fuck is going on?! What’s happening?!”

“Don’t follow me,” Poe warned. It all moved so quickly. Poe pulled the arrow out of his arm and ran away, only to be followed by a tall man wielding a crossbow with a miner’s light on it. 

Getting her bearings, Rey stood up and followed them, ignoring Poe’s warning. It was difficult given how dark it was and that she didn’t know the area that well, but she was able to find them just in time to see Poe crawling into a cave. 

“Poe?!” Rey called out. “Are you alright?!”

“Stop! Don’t follow me!” he warned again. Seeing two more arrows in him - one in his leg and another in his back - Rey decided to disregard him and investigate. She couldn’t tell if it was all the alcohol she consumed or her mind playing tricks on her but the next thing she knew, Poe’s body was being sucked up into the light at the end of the cave. 

“Poe?” Rey called out again. “Hello?”

As Rey walked further into the cave, the only thing she could see was a blinding light that beckoned her, like a moth to a flame. 

“What the fu-” was all she managed to get out as the light pulled her in.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Comments and kudos are appreciated if you liked the story!


End file.
